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Thursday, May 11th, 2006

Subject:Flashback
Time:5:49 pm.
Its been said, and I have to agree, that I have an avoidant personality. That doesn't mean I don't like people or don't want to be around them... that means I'm incredibly apprehensive about letting anyone too close. I don't like to become attached. I don't like to feel as though I need someone. Its a learned behavior though - I mean look how many honest to God best friends I've lost since college. Its no wonder I avoid attachment... I'm afraid that something will happen and the person will leave my life and I will have to deal with missing them. Not just missing them like I haven't seen you in a while, but missing them like a part of my life is gone.

Last night I was looking through my jnals from the college years to show something to Sarah... and I am realizing 1.what a great life I've had, 2. how unbalanced but insanely funny I was, and 3.that I've had the most amazing people in my life. Most of them now play a small or no role in my life, but they were my world back then. I needed them, and thats ok. I had the most fantastic things to say about them. Sure it sucked when they fell out of my life, but maybe its worth it?

Sometimes it scares me how much I needed Matt. I was so dependent on him... but after reading my old jnals, I'd give anything for things to be like that again.
Comments: Poke some fun.

Monday, March 13th, 2006

Time:9:10 pm.
Mood: tired.
Music:Get Up Kids.
This weekend was pretty fantastic. If I could remember more about it, I'd probably write about it. Its not very often that I can't remember what happened earlier that day. It was that insane.


But what I am thinking about now is something completely different. I remembered some things I had said when I was intoxicated, and began to wonder if I had given up on myself. Maybe I have. But maybe, what I am realizing is that at some point its ok to just let go. Not to worry about what you have, what you accomplished, what you may never have, and what you may never accomplish. Sure its important to have dreams and goals, but its also important to realize if you never reach them its not the end of the world. So maybe I've given up. Or maybe I will just take things as they come.





A dinner table conversation also got me thinking.... I am very independent. I like being independent. I want to be able to do things on my own, and I don't like feeling like I need people. Is that me being wanting to be an adult, or do I have some sort of bizarre attachment issue?
Comments: Poke some fun.

Sunday, March 5th, 2006

Subject:yikes
Time:2:07 pm.
Mood: annoyed.
Music:All American Rejects.
I just had my first experience with a flat tire.

This does not make me happy, as it only further complicates my life. Now I'm driving around on a donut and tire places are not open on sundays. I hope this tire is fixable, because then it will be of only moderate inconvenience and I can get it taken care of during the week. If its not, I have to go back to the place I got the tire (which is a NJ chain) because I have road hazard insurance, which is good because I would only pay half the price of a new one, but bad because A.I shouldn't be driving that far on a donut, B. Who has time to drive to NJ, and C. I'm sposed to be driving to Scranton on saturday morning.

Not happy. Not happy at all.

Now my productive day has gone to shit, I no longer feel like getting anything done.
Comments: Poke some fun.

Saturday, March 4th, 2006

Subject:wedding talk
Time:10:31 pm.

 You may not find this funny. But I did. I hope the links still work...

Auto response from Fluff: I've chosen my bridesmaid's dresses.
http://www1.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=148593&CategoryID=7757
Enjoy ladies ;-)

tide: that dress is AWESOME
Fluff: damn right
tide: i like the side ponytail
Fluff: it'll be even more awesome when you guys are wearing it
Fluff: yeah!
Fluff: and the stilettos
tide: i'd be even more awesome in hot pink
Fluff: you guys definitely need to get more heals to go with it
Fluff: not more heals
Fluff: those heals
Fluff: sorry
Fluff: i'm thinking some hot pink and some lime green
tide: i like this dress too
tide: http://www1.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=173827&CategoryID=14514&LinkType=EverGreen
tide: it looks like a sack
Fluff: that one is going to be mine!
Fluff: i'm wearing a wedding sack
Fluff: people will say- oh! that's such a beautiful sack you have on

Comments: Poke some fun.

Subject:Alright, I'm updating already.....
Time:11:45 am.
Mood: lethargic.
Music:Matt's Jesus song.
It has been pointed out to me that I have not been updating, so I thought I'd appease the masses and write a little something. Not sure why I haven't been writing, I'd say its due to lack of time, but we all know I fret what little time I have away and this is certainly one way to do that. Perhaps its a lack of things to write about?


Well I guess I'll start out w/ a happy bday to Terry and Mack, although I no longer talk to either one of them and do not believe they read this. Even if we aren't friends, I still remember your birthdays.

Now what has been goin on lately? School and work, as usual. I have an immense amount of work to do for both, but I don't seem to be stressing about it. I suppose I will when the due dates are closer (like in a week).

Things have been a little odd at work.... lots of kids out, many of them in other placements... screws with my plans a lot. We had a snowless snowday on thursday. No work or class, which was awesome. Of course I didn't use that time very wisely but oh well.

I gave up chocolate for Lent.

It sucks already.

Scranton for the parade a week from today. So far I believe its me, Jenn, Gretchen, Michelle, Christina, and Lisa. Mike and his friends are coming up as well, which is cool, cause we can hang out w/ them but also do our own thing. It is gonna be rockin'!

I haven't been home in a month. I'll prolly go the week after next. Speaking of home, I'm prolly moving back to NJ at the end of August. I know I had originally said I wouldn't, but first of all, NJ schools pay more, and more importantly, my mom really wants me home. I think she's lonely. Besides... there's nothing really keeping me here. I'll apply to a few PA schools, but I'm going to focus on NJ. My only major concern is that I have nothing in NJ but my mom and dad. I spent 2003 there completely miserable... but then again, Matt will be in NB and Dan might be back... and I'm sure I'll still see Jennofa and Liser wherever I am.
Oh, and about this whole teaching thing, I decided I wanna stay teaching middle school special ed, and I am most likely going to be certified in MS Math. I like teaching math better than any other subject. Yes, the math geek still lurks inside me.

I miss Sarah. She got a job in Kansas.


I have a cold. It sucks.

Bahamas in 1 month and 7 days. I have not dieted yet. I am lazy.


Alright, I gotta go get ready to meet Korinn. We are not meeting in the library, as there are two certain truths about when Korinn and I go to the library.

1. We will spend the entire time goofing around and get absolutely nothing done.
2. Someone will get stuck in an elevator nearby.
Comments: Poke some fun.

Sunday, February 19th, 2006

Subject:This weekend wasn't just great.... it was SCRANTASTIC!
Time:8:56 pm.
Mood: happy.
Music:Streetlight Manifesto - Point, Counterpoint.
So I was sitting in the bowling alley today thinking, this isn't indigestion I'm feeling...its happiness! I forgot what that was like!


This weekend really made me aware of how much I love, miss, and appreciate some of my friends. The weekend didn't really start for me until Saturday. I was thinking about Matt and how I hadn't talked to him in a while, and about 30 min later he called. He is one person that I feel very certain that I will know for the rest of my life. No doubts, I will always have my Matt, and thats a good feeling. In some ways its hard to believe we've been friends for 6 years (The "anniversary" of when we met just passed. He actually knows the day. How cute is that?) and in other ways it feel like a hellavalot longer than that.
Anywho, Saturday night I went to the bars in Easton w/ Jenn and Gretchen. We had a really good time, especially at Porter's. We ran into Marie, Ingrid, and Presti at Pearly Baker's, which was cool. All in all, it was a night of singing off key and tossing around JC's decapitated bobble head. Good times, Good times. When I got home (at 3:30 in the AM) I talked to Kiel for a little bit and remembered how much I love that kid too. I havent seen him in over two years..... I miss my husband!
Today Lisa and Mike came up from Reading to visit. Jenn and Michelle joined us, and we went to Damon's. The service was awful, but holey crap did I laugh my ass off. Its been a long time since all of us were together and it was everything I hoped and dreamed. Bowling was even more fun. I laughed from the moment Liser got here till the moment she left. I love my Scranton gals (plus Mike!) They are Scrantastic and I wish I saw them more often and more consistently. Overall, a fantastic weekend.... more than I could ask for.


....and now I hear Christina will be here tonight..... which is sweet.... 7 scrantonites in one weekend...
Comments: 1 concerned citizen - Poke some fun.

Tuesday, February 14th, 2006

Time:4:52 pm.
Mood: chipper.
Music:Remix '06!.
Today to school I wore a black long sleeved shirt with a grey tshirt that has a heart on it saying "Chocolate makes life worth living." Several people came up to me and commented that they were suprised I was wearing a heart. I never said I didn't like VDay. Do I give off that vibe? I'm completely indifferent. On second thought, I ate two cupcakes and like 8 pieces of candy today. I LOVE Vday. The Black mixes are just fun.... and requests...

In other news, these past few days I've actually been pretty chipper, which is a huge change. I think that weekend of doing nothing did me good. I also had my midyear eval today, and my boss had the nicest things to say about me. She ranked me as outstanding (which is the highest ranking and something first year teachers never get) in more than one area. She kept stressing what a big deal that was, which was a really cool feeling. Its not very often that I really feel proud about something I've done, and I can actually see how far I have come this year without anyone pointing it out to me. Its nice to actually feel some pride...
I mean, the kids say wonderful things about me all the time, but hearing it from Kelly was pretty freakin great. Especially because I've noticed that she tends to be harder on me than other teachers (probably cause its my only year there). I think I've belabored the point, but I'm actually pretty excited for once.
Comments: Poke some fun.

Tuesday, February 7th, 2006

Time:7:59 pm.
Mood:lost.
This weekend I was thinking. I was thinking about how fast my life is going by. How I feel like everyday I'm just wasting time until tomorrow. I don't know how I became a spectator in my own life, but I don't like it. I don't even feel like me anymore.
Comments: Poke some fun.

Monday, January 30th, 2006

Subject:i just don't get it
Time:6:55 pm.
Mood: depressed.
Music:emery.
Its no wonder I'm obsessed with death. I feel like its all around me. What makes it even scarier is that death is blind. It follows no patterns and can happen without warning.

A student in my school passed away over the weekend. A highschool student. He died suddenly while playing basketball with his friends.

Death doesn't even have an age range. Seems like they get younger and younger. I just don't understand it. He wasn't one of my students, and I didn't know him too well, but its still tough having so many grieving people around. Especially with students who don't know how to handle the situation... Then there's that whole part where I'm still feeling pretty depressed and lethargic. I'm fine at school when I'm busy but I come home and barely have the will to move from the couch to the kitchen. I'm sure once this actually hits me, I'm going to be 10x more obsessed with death. It's not that I fear my own death, but rather the death of those around me. I mean it really has surrounded me lately. You know, since I came to Lehigh, 3 clients from my old job, my Aunt Cathy, Phil, and a student from school have passed away. I've only been here a year and 8 months. Does that seem like a lot to you? Those are just the people I know.... the topic of death has seemed to come up a lot in the past two months.

What I really need is something to look forward to. Sometimes thats all that can keep ya goin', yanno? Or three months without anything catastrophic happening would be a nice change. At this point I'm not even sure I remember what happy feels like.
Comments: 3 concerned citizens - Poke some fun.

Wednesday, January 11th, 2006

Time:7:38 pm.
Mood:psychotic.
Music:Alkaline trio - Every thug needs a lady.
I always pride myself on being extremely logical, but these past few days I feel like I've been losing it. I have this new thing lately, where I guess I may have entered a new stage of mourning called irrational panic. Once I get home from work, I start thinking about people I love and become increasingly afraid something is going to happen to them. I have seriously worked myself up until I was freaking out. The worst part is, I know how irrational I'm being, but its like two sides of my brain not communicating. Its frustrating.

Then there is the insomnia. I didn't even realize it was back until today. I was talking to Dana and she was telling me a story about when she was sleeping, and I realized I had slept only 4 hrs for the third night in a row and was completely functional. This of course is not something new for me, my last insonmia spat was in August. The cool thing about it is for a while I have much longer days. The crappy part is after a few days things are gonna start getting all fuzzy and blurry, and I'll be tired all the time. Trying to go to bed these past few nights sucked because I was so freaking tired, but I just couldn't fall asleep. Its not even 8pm and I'm tired, but theres no use in going to bed early.

Then I'm kind of stressed out because they are a lot of things going on at work - paperwork due, big projects, evaluations..... plus my internship starts soon and that brings a lot more work, and classes start next week...

But more stressful than anything is trying to be ok with not knowing. I might not stay at Lehigh for the second cert. I'm not sure getting a second cert is the best choice. If I leave, where should I look for jobs? Do I want to stay in this area? Do I want to stay in PA? Am I ready for public school? Should I stay at centennial another year? Do I renew my lease? I don't know! I can't really make a decision until the pa dept of ed passes their new law and states its stipulations. For me, thats really hard. Even if I'm not super happy, I like the security of knowing where I'll be in a year. Not knowing kills me.



I feel like a freakin psycho.
Comments: Poke some fun.

Saturday, January 7th, 2006

Time:6:40 pm.
Mood: angry.
Music:Emery.
I was just on the phone with Matt and I had to get off because I was getting angry. I told him about the fight I had w/ Danny last week and he totally took Danny's side, which is ridiculous. When I explained more about what happened and about everything I had done for Dan, he started in with the you shouldn't expect too much of people and how if he expected anything of his friends he'd have none.

I don't think I do expect a lot. If I expected my friends to treat me how I treat them I'd have none. All I really want is friends who don't completely suck, and right now I can count on one hand the number of those I have. What does not completely sucking mean? It means friends who are at least somewhat accessible (even if it can be only be phone), want to hang out when they can, and are fairly reliable. Reliable? Why reliable? Ok, sometimes things are gonna come up, and plans have to be canceled or promises have to be broken. But really, who wants to have a friend who cancels their plans (and you never really know if you are gonna hang out or not) or who never follows through on what they say they are gonna do? Huge pet peeve of mine. Plus its always nice to have friends who actually seem to like you, and not just call to hang out when they are bored or have nothing better to do.

I don't think thats too much to ask for.
Comments: 5 concerned citizens - Poke some fun.

Thursday, January 5th, 2006

Time:8:28 pm.

Dear Diary,

 

 

Ever since Shawanna moved out, Karen has been a raging bitch. She wouldn’t even go to Charlie’s birthday party. In fact, at first she even acted like she didn’t even know who he was, even though he’s been her neighbor for 2 ½ years. I mean I realize that his cousin Nick broke her heart, but that has nothing to do with Charlie.

 

I thought she would be over this by now... )
 </o:p>

I just don’t know what’s up with her. Maybe she is depressed, with Shawanna gone and me back in Bethlehem. Then again it’s not like I don’t come home…. we chill at the Stone Pony every weekend! I’m going to have to beat some sense into her with some PVC piping.

 

Meanwhile, I feel bad for Charlie. He looks up to her, and she was talking about telling Lucille to keep him off the stoop (theirs is broken). I just hope she doesn’t do anything harsh, like hit him with a broom.

 

 

 

Love,

Carrie

 

 

 

PS I heart Dave!

 

 

 

I just got an email that she is planning on selling her house in Asbury Park.... I guess ts lonely in an empty house.... just her and the bums.

Comments: Poke some fun.

Tuesday, January 3rd, 2006

Time:5:36 pm.
ok, so I was reading Mike's j-nal and it referred to me and Asbury Park. Let me just say I was cracked out that day. I mean, I'm always whacky, and I usually have a humorous and or witty comment to add, but that day....

I seem to remember jumping on top of Mike's car.
And swing from my car door.
And talk about Asbury park, somewhat incessantly.
And read Karen a picture book entitled "Three Incestuous Sisters," substituting in my own words. (Although I don't know why that woman peed on the floor or why her baby was swimming in the pee.... but I do know why her sister's head exploded!)

Best part of break: Either goin to the Court Tavern to see Katie's cousin's band or lunch yesterday w/ Jenn and Liser.... I hadn't laughed that hard all year!

Worst: New Year's eve. But I always hate it.

Funniest thing that happened at school so far: KM smacking PS accross the face with a lunch tray.

So hear's to a better year.
Comments: 5 concerned citizens - Poke some fun.

Subject:So this is the new year....
Time:5:21 pm.
Mood: full.
Music:Emery.
I meant to post this on the 31st, but I forgot. Then on the 1st and 2nd I was lazy. So here it is.

As 2005 comes to a close……

My own twist on the year’s recap Kimmy posted. I chose some of the best lines from my journal entries in 2005. Granted, they are taken out of context, but they may still give you a chuckle.

• So this is the New Year....... and I don't feel any different. - Deathcabforcutie
• I was wrong, I was wrong, everybody sing a song!
• Unfortunately sometimes the thing I'm focused on is a thought in my head and I completely miss whole conversations.
Especially when he turned to the page with an origami penis and said, "hey look guys! Its a whacker! You whack people with it."
• It was less fun than when Deb gave me a snot shower on monday.
• Deb charges a woman, screaming "Mommy!"
• So we get everyone picked up, and Ellen's lunch explodes. Thats right, explodes.
• My flight from Atlanta to Philly was then canceled, and I am currently stranded with no luggage in Georgia.
• Last night wasn't entirely bad though... I got into a conversation about bringing my poop bucket to go get poop from the poop shack and I laughed so hard I almost ruptured my spleen.
• Cause today, when I walked out to my car after work, it would only be appropriate to find my shattered drivers side mirror sitting on top of my car instead of being attached to it.
• Cause I took a look at my phone bill, and the jerkface (edited for lenten purposes) who found it made some calls.
• Its times like these when you wish your dad was an alien that you talked to through a glowing tissue box and when you touch your index fingers together the whole world stops.
• Is that like mating season or what?
• Let me start off by saying that I'm an idiot.
It had the consistency of creamy mashed potatoes but smelled like... there aren't even words.
• When I got there I realized I didn't have my phone and since I was kind of drunk I think I must have asked about 25 strangers why Jesus hated me.
• When my midterm was over yesterday evening, I nearly did cartwheels. But I went a seminar on the Reauthorization of IDEA instead.
• He can't help that he's homosexual
• I wanted to post them in here, but although I am awesome, I am no technological genius
• At the end, Jeannie pulled me into the pit, where I quickly became full of other people's sweat.
• Saturday was a long but fun day and I think I got more exercise than that day I walked down the Grand Canyon (and back up).
• We went to the zoo up at Nay Aug Park and saw monkeys and lemurs, and sloths, oh my!
• It was so a gay pride convention
• I heart Witty Liquors.
Thats right, he peed on my leg.
• Canada cracks me up hardcore.
• I even danced to karaoke.
• I found myself making sound effects in addition to the noise the jet ski made, and singing a Blur song I don't know the words to.
• It's not a matter of pooping everyday... its a matter of what the poop looks like. Cause if its too poopy..." - the foreigner
• I've had two dreams in my life in which I was someone other than myself. In one of them I was George Washington
• two people, one pizza pie, one order of wings, one order of cheese fries.
• I am awesome.
Comments: Poke some fun.

Monday, December 19th, 2005

Time:3:36 pm.
Mood: sad.
These past few days have been really difficult. Harder than I ever wanted to imagine.
Late wednesday night I got a call from Danny that Phil had passed away. Today at the mass, the priest said something like
I know that the question in all of your minds is why? I wish I could tell you the answer but the truth is that I don't know. I know right now you feel like you will never find peace again, but in time you will.
It helped to be surrounded by friends who loved Phil as much as I did. We spent most of our time reminding each other of all the stupid things we did and how much fun we all had together. The hoboclown. V-O-X. The moonbounce.Angry bowling. The circumstances that brought us all together are horrible, but it was great to see everyone again, and it served as a reminder never to let that much time slip by again.
I am so thankful for my last memory of Phil. About a month ago Matt J asked me to go see his band in New Brunswick, so I called Matt (P) so we could hang out. When I pulled up to the lodge I saw Phil standing in front of it, smiling. I jumped out of the car and ran over to him, suprised to see him. He hugged me so hard I can almost still feel his arms around me. That was always one of the best things about Phil... his hugs. He was such a good guy and a great friend, and I am going to really miss him. I already do.

It also didn't help the situation that on thursday I found out Sarah (aka my wife on facebook) was moving back to Illinois. She is my closest friend these days and the one I spent all of my time with.
Today when I go back to Bethlehem, she won't be there, and thats going to be hard.

Right now, I do feel like the world has stopped and like I might never find "happy" again. I know life goes on, but I wish we could pause it a while until we are ready to face it again. I'm glad I get to come back on friday and be w/ the h-boro crew again. I am just worried about the days in between.

I know I really didn't talk about what happened with many non h-boro people. I guess I really only want to talk about it with people who know and love him like I do. No one else can really understand.
Comments: Poke some fun.

Thursday, December 15th, 2005

Time:10:17 am.
Mood: numb.
Music:Finch.
Sometimes things happen and you think "this is truly the worst day in my life." I don't mean when stupid small things happen and you overreact. I mean.... huge things. We are talking legitimately the worst day in your entire life. But eventually another day comes along and it seems to top even that. Now I don't know if it really is worse or just seems that way because time has passed, but it doesn't much matter. It just sucks.


People say that everything happens for a reason. I think thats a crock of shit. I think sometimes things happen that have no rhyme or reason to it at all. In some ways thats a hard concept to grasp. Its easier to make it through each day thinking there is some sort of plan. There isn't. There can't be a plan for some people and not for others. No one's plan can possibly be to die in a plane crash or car accident or from a disease. That doesn't make sense and don't dare try to convince me otherwise. No one is supposed to die at 22.





If you aren't from the Hboro please don't call me this weekend.
Comments: 1 concerned citizen - Poke some fun.

Wednesday, December 14th, 2005

Time:10:06 pm.
Mood: crushed.
Music:Emery.
I just found out today that thanks to state qualification, it looks like special education certification will get not get me very far. Apparently now I need dual certification. This sucks for 1 million reason to be adressed at a later time. Just know now my graduation date has been moved to December '06 at the earliest.
Comments: 1 concerned citizen - Poke some fun.

Monday, December 12th, 2005

Time:1:39 pm.
I just won Teacher of the Week again. I am awesome.
Comments: 3 concerned citizens - Poke some fun.

Monday, December 5th, 2005

Time:9:10 pm.
Mood: exhausted.
Music:Thursday - Understanding In a Car Crash.
This past week has been absolute hell. 70% of my grade in my TBTE Social Studies class was due today. First off WTF? I thought TBTE classes were supposed to be easy! 50% of my grade in Academic & Curricular is due wednesday.

This is how the last week went for me:
Sunday, Nov 27th: I was in the library I believe from about 2pm-12am. Could have been earlier than 2pm, I'm not 100% positive.
Monday, Nov 28th: Went to Scranton to visit Kimmy. Worked in the library 5pm-12am
Tuesday, Nov 29th: Went to work, stayed till 5, Dinner w/ Fede and Ash, library 8:15pm-12:30am
Wednesdaym Nov 30th: Went to work, went to class, Library 8:30ish pm - 11:30 pm. In all fairness I spent most of that time goofing off talking to Matt J on aim.
Thursday, Dec 1st: Work till 4:30, exhausted and irrational, napped till 7, worked on paper 9pm - 12:30am at home (oc at 8)
Friday, Dec 2nd: Work till 5, dinner w/ Sarah****, library 6pm-10pm. Pie and hanging out w/ Sarah
Saturday, Dec 3rd: Library 10:15 am-10pm (only left to eay dinner w/ Jenn and Sarah)worked on it at home 11pm-12am and 2am-3:30 am
Sunday, Dec 4th: Worked on project from home 10:30am-5pm, 6:30pm-10pm, Library 10:15pm-1:40am
Today, Dec 5th: Worked on project at work from 2:45pm-4:45pm, drove to Iaccoca worked 5:15pm-6:45pm and finished.

And now I have my other paper and presentation due wed. The paper is 40% done and the presentation is 0% done. I was gonna work on it tonight but I am too tired and burnt out.

All nighter tomorrow? It'd go nicely w/ the 4.5 hrs I slept last night.



Let it Snow! Let it Snow! Let it Snow!



****two people, one pizza pie, one order of wings, one order of cheese fries.

We are awesome. IFOCE for life!
Comments: 2 concerned citizens - Poke some fun.

Monday, November 28th, 2005

Subject:If you live alone, can you ever really call it home?
Time:4:17 pm.
Mood: contemplative.
Music:Alkaline Trio.
I just got back from visiting Kimster in Scrantonia. It got me thinking about a lot of this, but one the way home what I thought of was this: In our graduation speech, Father McShane said " I truly hope these won't be the four best years of you life."


A lot of time has passed since May 2003, when I got my diploma and said my goodbyes.

I've been at Lehigh now for a year and a half, and I'm very comfortable. I guess I have finally transformed into a Lehigh student. A lot has happened with my Scranton friendships, and people who once meant the world to me are now reduced to mere memories. My attachment to the school itself has faded, although the memories will never die.

For the first two years after graduation, whenever I made my way back to Scranton, I felt this overwhelming sense of being home. Sure, it was different, but it was still home. I can't say I felt the same when I went back today. This isn't a bad thing, I have grown up and moved on, as we all must eventually do.

At the same time, I can't help but feel that although I wouldn't say that I'm unhappy now, 3 of those 4 years were, and always will be, the best of my life. I sat through Champagne's class with Kimmy and it was everything that I remembered. When I talked to Hueston and Champagne, they had the exact reaction to seeing me that I said they would. The first thing Champagne said was "they let you out of Bethlehem?" Both teachers knew much about my life after Scranton, and it made me wonder how common that is. I owned that school. Maybe not the whole school, but the history department. When it comes to that department, I was without a doubt the most known student in my year, and likely of the years around it. Regardless of the class, whether it be history, math, finance, theology, teachers knew me. I never went unnoticed. I certainly left my mark.

And that was only the academic side of it all.


Over the past year and a half, and especially over the past three months, I have grown up incredibly. This is a good thing - I know many people probably wondered if it ever would happen. Don't get me wrong, I can still be incredibly goofy (ask my students), but I've become much more responsible and I guess I've calmed down a bit. In doing so, I seem to have also become less in-your-face star of the show and more socially withdrawn and socially awkward. I can't help but wonder if when you grow up, part of you dies. Maybe some of the good part.

I had a very..... I had a weekend. But I will talk about it at a later period and time, which will probably be never, because I have a ridiculous amount of work done in less than a week.
Comments: Poke some fun.

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